Sensitive Girl - Cristiane Cardoso - English | Cristiane Cardoso - English



  • Someone who is easily affected by anything.
  • Someone who is easily offended or keeps grudges.
  • Someone who can see things in depth.

Some women look for sensitive men, others have pride in saying they are sensitive. But if we analyze the definition of the word “sensitive”, we’ll come to the conclusion that being sensitive can be both positive and negative at the same time – which should alert us immediately.

Women can be very sensitive once in a while, perhaps because of a comment made, something that didn’t go as planned, or simply because she’s on “those days” in which life seems so unfair… There is nothing wrong in being sensitive towards good things in life, for example, the needs of our family members. The majority of times, they don’t say it, but they’re in need of love, care, attention, and so forth. If we are not sensitive towards their needs, we won’t end up doing what needs to be done to help them – no matter how hard we try.

So, sometimes, there are situations in life that require sensitivity from our part, especially from us, women. However, in regards to problems, our attitude should be completely different. We cannot overcome a problem reacting in a sensitive way! Problems are persistent situations that cause us extreme discomfort; they can be diseases, teen problems, addictions, etc. Every time we deal with our problems with a sensitive heart, we feel sorry for ourselves. This is called self-pity, and it’s one of the worst characteristics of a sensitive person.

We want others to sympathize towards our situation. And when it doesn’t happen, we feel even worse, we get the feeling that no one understands us, no one loves us, that we don’t have value – the list of negative thoughts is unending, so, we take the next step – we begin to complain. Exactly as what the Bible in Proverbs 27:15 says:

A continual dripping on a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike;

Some are so advanced in the arts of complaining that that it’s no surprise they’re so isolated – who can deal with this type of attitude? Self-pity blinds us. It doesn’t let us see what’s causing the problem and how to deal with it. On the contrary, it makes us blame ourselves and others – which obviously doesn’t not solve anything.

It’s sad to see how many women don’t understand this. Women of all ages, young and old, who simply don’t recognize how wrong they are in being sensitive when a situation asks the opposite: being insensitive, resistance, being severe and the like. Weaknesses, mistakes, injustices and problems require a severe attitude, which means that we have to be strong (without seeking the sympathy of others) and to always be in the faith.

How can a person use their faith while they have self-pity towards their problems? It’s impossible! The women who bled for 12 years heard of Jesus’ miracles and believed. She didn’t even care about the fact that she would have to walk under the sun with all the clothing around her waist. All she wanted was to be healed. She said in Mark 5:28:

…“If I may touch His garments, I shall be healed.”

Many of us would’ve stayed at home waiting for the pastor to visit us; and if it didn’t happen, they would complain to the bishop. When that women touched the clothes of the Lord Jesus, she was immediately healed. Notice that she didn’t need a counseling session for this to happen; she didn’t complain when she was pushed around by other people who also wanted Jesus – to be honest, she didn’t even ask for His attention! That women used an intelligent faith. She was tired of being a victim for 12 years, she decided to be insensitive, and this way she managed to use her faith to be completely healed. How about you? Until when will you keep pitying yourself?

(Excerpt from my first book “Better than a New Pair of Shoes”, available on Christian Books Plus and your local UCKG HelpCentre.)

Collaborated: Cristiane Cardoso

Leave your comment on this post

  • eunice phuti mehale

    Being sensitive in a negative way do really affect n change the way an individual can think or see things. Every time things do not go our way we are hurt And thinks that we are alone and no one really want to help. It will even lead an individual to think things that do not exist and see things in a very wrong way. And being sensitive bit by bit brings hatred and grudges and is really not good for one’s spiritual life

  • Mildred Andisi

    Self pity makes us never see the potential in us. It is a tool of the devil to make many victims of their problems. I made up my mind never to pity myself whatsoever but to address every situation with boldness and courage.

  • Lerato

    When I stop being sensitive I will be able to use my faith and overcome the situation.

  • Thandi Manzini

    Self pity impedes growth cos you are always at the centre of situations. Even God is unable to use somebody like this cos she is always self occupied instead of Jesus occupied.

  • Agrippine N

    it can be a positive or negative effect on people to be be sensitive. some people even become proud that they are sensitivity to things. the fact is that we have to be sensitive to the word of God and to use our faith as well.

  • Olivia Hobyani

    I raise my hand to that because I used to be sensitive towards any situation that Seemed “unfair” on the next person that in most cases I ended up developing the “hero syndrome”

    That attitude didn’t always end well because in most cases I would transfer all those emotions even of the victim onto myself and that wasn’t helping any situations at all cos i would end up being frustrated.

    So lately I have learnt to stay away from any situation that would push me to be irrational and play the hero and understand that some situations have to happen to allow the next person the same freedom that I had to go through in order to grow up, women up and never succumb to any disadvantageous situation.

    #Personal battles

  • Gloria Katende

    Here I learned to look to the word of God alone and seek for courage to do it to go ahead and not to any human being’s approval. With this we eliminate this kind of sensitivity.
    Thanks for the share.

  • Dee

    Love this Mrs Chris! This is intelligence and this is the attitude that we must have towards problems. I thank God for the school of faith because was here I learnt this. I use to be a person of self pity, always crying and today I make my problems cry! Ha look at that! I love how you explained the difference in being sensitive.

    Also I am so looking forward to the Love school here in New York September 3rd! I can’t wait!!!! It will be an incredible blessing. Kisses.

    ( I also wish you had the Godllywood journal in English but in due time. )

    May God protect you and Renato on your journey to New York , may he bless this event in Jesus name. I know God will use you guys tremendously. Also remembering those in Texas. The Holy Spirit knows everything.

  • Amanda fikile Sifunda

    This message made me to realise that to be self pity is not a good thing cause you ended up blaming others on what has not done upon your life..self pity makes us to loose our self esteem and ended up negative..with God besides us the is no need to be self pity cause he gives us everything only if we Obey His ways..

  • kodde colleen catherine

    True miss Cristiane,a woman of God has to be very sensitive to the voice of the Holy Spirit more than anything else because she is always connected to Him but she also has to be sensitive to danger like non-christian environment for her to remain in connection with God. so teaches me to continue doing the same not only today but till he end.

  • Awor Carolyne suzan

    Learning from the woman who was bleeding for 12 years, that in hard times I don’t need to look for sympathy from others or develop sensitive self pity attitudes, instead I should use an intelligent faith identify the root of the problem and see how I can solve it.

  • Senate

    Being sensitive is like being fragile and it is not good for as woman of God.because it is letting the heart rule over intellect.if we feel self pity towards ourselves we will not change anything.

  • Mamohapi

    I learned that I have to be sensitive when listening to the voice of God…and also I have always to be connected to the Holy Spirit

  • Rabecca Chileshe

    There are times when I’ve fallen into the pit of sensitivity especially when something goes wrong or things don’t turn out as expected or something bad happens to me. I would dwell on the situation so much and even search for sympathy from others. Through the guidance of the Holy Spirit, through what we’re taught at church and even what I’m learning here, I know such an emotion won’t get me anywhere except feeling worse than before. Using my mind, reasoning helps me to use my faith intelligently to look at situations clearly and handle them strongly, without using emotion or showing weakness.

  • zandile mabuza

    I understand that as a woman I must be sensitive when it comes to the things of the Lord and that sensitivity must be positive.


    From this post we learn that we should consider our actions and use our sensitivity in a good manner. also we learn to avoid feeling pity for us but take actions of faith, for an actionless faith is foolish

  • Mogau Maffa

    I understand that as women it is allowed to be sensitive but using an intelligent faith. And should stop feeling pity for myself it will end up weakening us within or spiritually.

  • Nekesa Janet

    i this massage i learnt that i should not use emotion and feeling.

  • Mutesi Grace Kabanyankole

    This teaches me to practice the word of God and seek for courage to go an extra mile and not to any man’s appreciation. With this I remove sensitivity from my life. Amen.